So many updates. Some at dipikakohli.com, for example, and also behind the scenes.
Tag Archives: sharingstories
This week, in the writing project online with the people I do that with, every Tuesday and Wednesday, something came up that surprised me. The cojournal is taking an interesting turn. I want to share more in the conversation space for that, in email threads and in the protected forums, but here, for now, this little note. Inspired by something that MK wrote Sharing that it’s too hard to make friends that are high-quality but not overburdensome. Emotional labor, et al.
I really couldn’t believe how much there is to say about this topic, and some people have said it, insisting in lists of the kind of things that indicate that you are truly showing up for friends what is required now for someone to ‘show up for a friend.’ Really?
Discussing it. In The Cojournal Project.
‘How can I best support you right now?’

How to validate someone’s feelings
From: https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/emotional-support#takeaway
‘Think about the last time you went through something difficult. You probably wanted to talk to someone about the problem, but you may not have necessarily wanted them to fix it for you or make it go away.
‘Maybe you just wanted to vent your frustration or disappointment and get some soothing acknowledgment in return.
‘Support doesn’t require you to fully understand a problem or provide a solution. Often, it involves nothing more than validation.
When you validate someone, you’re letting them know you see and understand their perspective.
‘The support people often want most is recognition of their distress. So, when a loved one tells you about the challenges they’re going through, they may not need you to jump in and help. You might offer the best support simply by showing concern and offering a caring presence.
‘Some validating phrases you can use are:
- “I’m sorry you’re dealing with that situation. It sounds so painful.”
- “That sounds so upsetting. I understand why you’re feeling so stressed right now.”
Note: Design Kompany (that’s where I publish and co-create more often than over here, lately) will be doing a mental health focused set of zines soon, for S P A C E. Some of those will fall under the category ‘Baok of Feelings,’ which we are co-creating currently with our team in Saigon. Wish us luck.:)

Click to go to #spacethezine page >

End of the Rainbow (2020)
My first book, The Elopement, was about running off to Ireland to get married. Kind of. I didn’t mean to run off, and I didn’t mean to get married. Lots of things happen in the course of, well, youth. Next year marks the 20-year anniversary of the events in that book’s main story, and I wanted to write a follow-up one. Its working title is End of the Rainbow.